Antichrist (2009)
As this is my the first review that I have written for the
blog, I’ve decided to take it upon myself to shit on what I consider to be one
of the most disappointing films that I have ever had the misfortune of wasting
my precious time on.
The Plot
Antichrist is an
‘artsy’ horror film written and directed by Lars Von Trier. Never heard of
Trier? Well that might have something to do with the fact that he is actually a
German director who spews out nothing but indie bullshit and porn. Although I
am not personally familiar with his porn work, after watching the dick-smashing
fun he had with Antichrist I would probably suggest staying away from it. The
film begins with a black and grey fuck-fest between the main characters who are
brilliantly named ‘He’ (Willem Dafoe) and ‘She’ (Charolette Gainsboroug). I
don’t use the term “fuck-fest” lightly either, the film literally starts with
the happy couple doing the bone dance (stunt cock included).
Right in the heat of the moment their infant son breaks out of his crib and swan dives out of the bedroom window. The rest of the movies follows ‘He’ and ‘She’ as they deal with the loss of their baby. Things go from bad to worse as ‘He’ decides to use his background as a psychologist to treat his wife at their home. He strips her of her grief medication and attempts to mend her broken heart himself (bad idea). The situation worsens as her mental health deteriorates and after about a half hour of crying and semi-rape scenes they leave the safety of their home and go to her secluded family cabin in the woods of Eden. This is where the real action happens. The entire second half of the movie (which is separated into four acts) is basically just a collection of sex, extreme violence, and slow-motion nature shots, all leading to one of the most fucked up climaxes in movie history.
 |
| Stunt cock? |
Right in the heat of the moment their infant son breaks out of his crib and swan dives out of the bedroom window. The rest of the movies follows ‘He’ and ‘She’ as they deal with the loss of their baby. Things go from bad to worse as ‘He’ decides to use his background as a psychologist to treat his wife at their home. He strips her of her grief medication and attempts to mend her broken heart himself (bad idea). The situation worsens as her mental health deteriorates and after about a half hour of crying and semi-rape scenes they leave the safety of their home and go to her secluded family cabin in the woods of Eden. This is where the real action happens. The entire second half of the movie (which is separated into four acts) is basically just a collection of sex, extreme violence, and slow-motion nature shots, all leading to one of the most fucked up climaxes in movie history.
My Take
My disappointment with this movie stems from the fact that I
actually really enjoyed the plot. A grieving couple with an already vulnerable
marriage who try to escape the pressure of the world by going to a secluded
cabin in the woods is an original and rather realistic premise for a horror
movie. Pair that with the sub-plot that follows the insanity of the woman and
her monstrous past and you have a movie that I could really get behind. The
biggest problem with the film is the religious, sexual, and psychological
under-tones that it attempts to convey. While watching the movie I literally
felt as though I was expected to analyse every single slow-motion scene and
line of dialogue. Trier was trying way too hard in my opinion. I understand
that he wanted to get a ‘message’ across, and he really wanted his film to mean
something, but the overload of subliminal hints really distracts from the
movie. Unless you have the free time to watch it repeatedly, it is very
difficult to understand. It also seemed like he couldn’t make up his mind about
what he wanted to say. Is this a movie about the hatred of women? Religion? Or
a skewed interpretation of the struggles of a grieving couple? That being said,
the film wasn’t a total train-wreck. The camera and lighting used in the film
did a phenomenal job of maintaining the depressing mood, and although the
soundtrack used wouldn’t have been my first choice it definitely does the job.
The acting overall is more than exceptional, thank god for that considering
there are only two characters. I think that Trier thought that leaving the
characters nameless would help the audience identify with them emotionally, and
maybe that works for some people, but it just left me feeling disconnected.
 |
| FUCK |
The Verdict
I really wish that this movie had been written and directed
by somebody other Trier, because the end result could have been a grade-A
horror flick. The story is realistic for the most part (religious bullshit
aside), and the lighting/music really draws you in. The directing however is
really lackluster, the slow-motion scenes make the movie drag on, and Trier has
an extremely annoying habit of ‘cutting and pasting’ dialogue scenes. Rather
than feeling complete after the closing credits, the movie makes you feel
confused and stupid. The ending is
fucking silly and not even remotely satisfying. Maybe if I had watched the
movie ten more times I would finally understand it and have some sort of
outstanding revelation. I know that there are going to be a bunch of fucking
hipsters that read this review and shit their pants because I ‘don’t
understand’ the movie, but honestly what is the point of a movie if the
audience doesn’t understand it? A movie should focus on the story first and
then the message, any other formula leaves the audience confused. Trier’s
method of communication is tired and outdated, like the telegram, or
Shakespeare. My final verdict is a generous…
4.5/10
No comments:
Post a Comment